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Get your votes in, people!

So far: the girl votes are leading by 2.

How do you know?

With tomorrow's promising ultrasound on the horizon, I've been wondering how people dealt with not knowing the gender of their baby until birth. I actually can't imagine it!

Here are some old wives' tales and other methods of "knowing":

The Ring Test: Tie your wedding ring to 12 inches of thread and dangle it over your belly. If it goes in circles = boy. Side to side = girl.

The Baking Soda Test:  Apparently you pee in a cup containing a tablespoon of baking soda. If it fizzes, it's a boy. If it doesn't, it's a girl.

Baby's Heart Rate: Above 140, and you have a girl, below and it's a boy.

Movement: I've been told this one both ways: more movement is a girl. Or it's a boy. And how do you determine more movement?

Morning Sickness: Another I've heard more than one way. More sickness is supposed to signify a girl. Or a boy. Or sickness in the morning = girl, night = boy. Or the opposite. So this one is out!

Stealing your beauty: This is a mean one. If you look like crap, it's because you're having a girl and she's stealing your beauty.

Hair: Do you need to shave your legs? If you suddenly find that you don't need to, you are having a girl. Or you paid a lot of money for laser hair removal.

Drano: This is bizarre. Apparently you add 2 tablespoons of clear Drano to a jar, then pee in the jar. Step back, as a horrible-smelling chemical reaction is said to take place, then observe. Did the liquid turn brown? Boy. Stay the same? Girl.

No thanks...

The Chinese Gender Chart: This mystical chart matches your age and month of conception with a gender prediction. Hint: it says boy for me. Click here to view.

Cravings: Supposedly, if you crave sweet things, you are having a girl. If you crave sour things, a boy. I don't know anyone who craves sour things. Sour-sweet candies? Sure. Lemon slices: (this was the example in my book) no. That's yucky. For the record I'm craving neutral things. Safe things, like carbs. :) I haven't wanted pickles or chips (salty) or cookies or cupcakes (yes I'm serious) or acidic things like tomatoes, and I think it's all because my stomach was so upset for so long. Sorry, folks.

Don't forget to take my poll, at right!

Avocado

This week finds baby O at 4.5 inches long and 3.5 ounces.

Things are starting to move into their appropriate position, like eyes and ears, and the scalp prepares for hair.

Babycenter for week 16

Oh yeah, and we should find out tomorrow what gender this creature is!

Drywall is up!

Tough times

I am not a fan of the economy right now. I am not a fan of layoffs, or reduced hours, or the loss of morale that comes from the "popcorn" layoff (like SURPRISE! You're unemployed.)...I'm also not a fan of what this tension, worry, and fear do to us as individuals, as human beings. I'm not happy with the climate of my work life right now. Uncomfortable doesn't begin to describe it. Stuck? Maybe.

I'm not happy with the decisions I'm forced to make right now as an employee, a daughter, a sister, a wife... in this, which should be the happiest of times for me, I have so much anger, fear, and uncertainty.

I guess the bottom line is that I'm starting to get mad.

I'm so disappointed in people. Do you know the feeling? I'll bet you do, and it is the WORST. I don't wish it on anyone. Increasingly this world seems a harsh and unforgiving place to bring such a beautiful, innocent life into.

Just less than a year ago, J's accident showed me the best in people. Not all of them. It also showed me the worst in some people I'd held dear. I chalked it up to a good chance to find out things I need to know about those around me. Who is truly my friend? Who deserves my love and attention. For the most  part, I felt an outpouring of love and affection for those around me. People were there when we needed them. They bolstered  us in dark days, and continued to love and respect us in the difficult months to come. Getting married gives you this feeling, but you don't see the extent of it, not really. There is a glow around you; you are the center of attention; and well, it's easy to love you then. It's all happiness and champagne. J's accident really held the mirror of truth up to me and forced me to make some difficult decisions.

But I promise: it wasn't all bad. It was so overwhelmingly GOOD that I felt I could live in the glow of it forever, and slough the bad interactions off with a simple shrug of my shoulders. Having a baby should bring the same outpouring of love, happiness, rainbows and puppies: after all - who doesn't love a new baby?! But this time I enter the process with a different perspective; more protective of my heart, and J's, and that of this child.

Here we are, in the end of June, months before it should get really mushy for us, and already I'm finding out that I'm disappointed. Just disappointed, as though disappointment isn't one of the absolute worst feelings in the human experience. It encapsulates sadness, surprise, missed expectations, a deflation of hope, a deflation of promise, and carries a tinge of worry: if this person is capable of this, who is next? Can we truly love each other? Are we capable? Are we too selfish? I missed one feeling that is packaged in with disappointment for our displeasure: anger. Am I angry with the very people who disappoint me? Or perhaps at myself, for believing that they wouldn't, couldn't...am I mad at myself for allowing myself to feel disappointed again...for putting myself out there...for trusting...

Why shouldn't I have hope and believe in the good in others? What a sad world it would be indeed if I could not. And yet, would it be less sad if only I could see it coming? Did having warning of a layoff lessen the blow? Does a set of low expectations ever actually make cruelty hurt less?

I don't think so.

I believe that to bring new life into this world is to acknowledge that you have HOPE. And no matter what, no matter how bruised and battered my little heart may be, I have it.

And you can't take it away.

Before we close the wall...

Two more from the living room

A before and after? Maybe I should call it before and during...

Friday I came home to this big hole in the back of the house! This is where our sliding door was.

And this morning: doors installed, plastic covering the area that once was door and now will be wall.

More birthday pictures

The home reno process continues!

Well, folks, we are at it again!

Welcome to Remodel Phase 2

The slider is gone and a new door frame is in place. J removes wood paneling from walls

Our new door will be 1.5' narrower so that we have more room for our tv (which will go back where it was)

The un-drywalled patch has been there (left) since we closed in the door to what is now the closet and master bathroom. That wall also has nasty wood paneling which...must also come down!

Panes of glass are in

J forms an electrical system for the wires that will lead to our tv (which will be mounted on the wall) and new surround sound bar.

Doors are in

Wood paneling off!

This clever system of gangboxes and black tubing will enable the wires to run behind the tv and receiver in an organized manner

Another clever "j" solution: He makes tent-like zippered doors from zisqueen to keep dust and debris out of non-construction-zone ares. It really keeps the mess contained. If there is interest I can explain how they are made. In other news, how do you spell visquene? visqueen?

Words you should stop saying

I'm going to go ahead and tell you two words (in combination) that you should make an effort to remove from your speech patterns. If you can go ahead and stop saying them you will find that you sound more composed and are no longer wasting time and precious words. :)

Did you notice I already typed them twice?

"Go ahead"

Feel free to continue using in a logical sentence, such as, "Go ahead and see where the rest of the group is; I'll wait here."

Please stop using them in a sentence like this one: "I'm going to go ahead and tell you where she is." That was an 11-word sentence. 5 of the 11 words were repetitive. In an effort to be long-winded, it helps to realize where redundancies lie. "I'm going to go ahead and" should look ridiculous when reading it. It also sounds ridiculous. So many of us fill our speech with filler words when we could just pause if we need to collect our thoughts. The same is true of "ummm" (yes, an obvious one since UMM is not a word) and "so." Do you find yourself ending sentences with "that's what she said. So..." You may not realize you do this. It's actually a notifier to your listener of nervous energy, apprehension, or fear. Be confident and end your sentence with a period! Or an exclamation point! "Yes, that is what she said." No "so" about it!

I'm a sad, sad girl

I'm so sad, and tired, of seeing my friends and co-workers lose their jobs. It's disheartening and scary. Today I lost a dear friend to budget concerns, and my days will never be the same here.

It's so hard to watch the landscape of your work environment change. We become accustomed to the same views, sounds, and activities in our daily lives. As a cube dweller, I have become so familiar with my neighbors, we have a special bond. Kristin is a dear person, and a great friend. When J was home from the hospital, she made us dinner and brought drawings from each of her children wishing him well. They had asked her what kind of person he was, what he liked, she told them what she knew and I got these adorable renderings of a muscle man with a bicycle and a football field. She would drive to Irvine every day from Corona (in case you don't know, it's a whole county away on a terribly congested freeway). She works so hard for her children, who are so well-behaved and polite that you know she is raising them well.

Kristin, who has these three beautiful children to care for on her own.

Please, if you can spare the time today, say a prayer for Kristin and her children.

Mmmm Yummy Cupcakes!

I referenced these little beauties from my weekend post, and here is some more detail.

These are chocolate chip cookie-vanilla cupcakes from Martha Stewart Living (July 2011 issue)

The recipes themselves are fantastic; worth buying the issue for!

She starts with a basic cookie recipe, a recipe which my oven burned when I made these darling minis to top the cupcakes:

There is cookie dough pressed into the bottom of the cupcake wrapper, then the silky and delicious vanilla cake batter is placed on top.

Finally, a dollop of creamy vanilla buttercream.

Yum!

Apple

Baby O is an apple this week!

4 inches long (crown to rump again) and 2.5 ounces.

Baby Center for week 15.

This is the week I've started to feel some movement, which is exciting. I had an ultrasound on Tuesday and this baby is ACTIVE! I don't think he/she ever stopped moving and fidgeting. It was hard for the doctor to measure her/him. I have another one a week from day and we will be finding out GENDER!! Stay tuned...

Both pictures show a side profile (head on the right, body on left). You can see the spine if you look closely (on top). The top picture maps out the heartbeat.

The Wall That Heals

This Sunday (Father's Day) I had the opportunity to visit the Wall That Heals, a traveling exhibit featuring a replica of the Vietnam War Memorial.

I had only just found out from J's mom that it would be in town and it was right by my house!! So once my parents, brother, and grandmother came over we hopped in the car and went down there. 

The idea is that the wall will travel to all the Americans who cannot make it to the wall, and even as a replica it has such a profound impact. It's really beautiful, as is the respect and reverence of all those who visit. This was the wall's only CA stop for a while, and I felt so lucky to have seen it. I highly recommend making a trip if it's anywhere close to you.

Left of center. The original is taller than a person, so this is probably 50% or less.

Right of center.

The trailer that accompanies the wall is a mobile museum, featuring memorabilia and letters.

The original is made of shiny black marble and this mimics the look.

People had left flowers, notes for loved ones, and flags. It was very touching. Also, the city we live in had posted full-page reports on any "native son" lost in this war.

Weekend

This weekend was lovely, and I do have more pictures to post when I get them from J's camera, but here is just a taste:

Excuse the quality; they're from my phone.

Leaning on J's arm when I'm too tired to hold my head up. haha.

From-scratch vanilla icing; more info to come

Better pics to follow of these AMAZING cookie-cupcakes

Baking and evidence that my oven is really horrible. Burnt, undercooked, burnt to a crisp, on one pan! Incredible!

Vanilla batter. MMMMMM.

J and Koal snuggle in Big Bear